I had a conversation the other day with my friend, Darlene, about her relationship with her ex-boyfriend. She learned the hard way about setting boundaries.
Darlene was in a relationship with a man who always wanted her attention and time. Whenever she went out with a friend he would whine and complain that she left him alone and why couldn't she see her friend while he was at work. (At this point, he was semi-retired and only worked 3 days a week).
Fortunately, Darlene was wise enough not to relent and share a home with him, (even though he constantly suggested it) so they both had their own places. Yet, this didn't stop Rich from his constant complaining that she should spend more time with him and not with her family or friends.
Darlene tried to set boundaries with him but to no avail. Finally, he became so possessive that after almost 3 years, she ended the relationship.
I'm blessed to have a wonderful husband and when we first got together he couldn't understand why I needed my "space", my "alone time". My alone time is what energizes and invigorates me. Some people get their energy by being with others. Hubby is one of those people. I had to set my boundaries right at the start that mornings were my time to meditate, read, reflect or whatever I needed to do to get my day off to a good start. It took a little training but he's totally on board now. In addition, I encourage him to spend time with his friends having lunch and talking sports or whatever they talk about when women aren't around!
Furthermore, he knows I need time to exercise, visit with friends, shop and take part in other things he has no interest in. And I leave him alone when he watches his favorite TV show - Judge Judy!
We have learned how to set healthy boundaries so that we are both happy.
Setting boundaries has nothing to do with love and it doesn't mean that you care about the other person less. In fact, it's a way of showing that you love and respect yourself and your partner enough to protect what you need and to give your partner what he/she needs, too.
Darlene is much smarter now and even though at times she is missing him - they did have wonderful times together despite his neediness - she is much happier and will not make this mistake again.
xo
Thursday, September 12, 2019
Thursday, September 5, 2019
My Three Goals
I have set three goals for myself to be realized by September 1, 2020. Yes, most people start goals on New Years Day, but that is no matter to me. I have chosen one year from now.
I am reading The Miracle Equation by Hal Elrod and was inspired by this book to set new goals for myself now. I am a bit hesitant to share them publicly as "someone" may hold me accountable! However, if I'm serious about attaining these goals, wouldn't I want to be held accountable?
So here goes; my three goals are:
1. To have this blog read by people I don't know - having it go public and getting noticed.
2. To have attained level 3.5 in pickleball.
3. To have completed a collage for my son and one of the San Francisco skyline.
There, I've said it. Phew.
A bit of an explanation regarding my goals is needed. My first goal to have my blog noticed is because it's not being read. There are hundreds of thousands of blogs out there and mine is a little personal one yet it would be nice to have someone read it. Yes, friends are reading it and actually that is very important but many of them already know what is going on in my life. I'm really writing this blog because having lived six decades I have experienced events that might be helpful to others if I share them.
Goal two - I started playing pickleball this year and am totally and completely addicted and want to improve. I'm guessing I'm at a 2.5 level now and have no idea how quickly one can improve but a 3.5 doesn't seem out of reach. Perhaps I'm living in a dream - but I'll give it a shot.
I was painting for about 10 years and due to various circumstances took an extended break. Now I'm interested in creating collages. I completed my first collage this spring in honor of my son, Anthony, who died almost four years ago. I love that piece of art and it is hanging in my home. Now I will create one for my younger son, Nick, who is a remarkable young man.
I have begun two different ones about Nick, but was unhappy with them. Time to start anew and work through the fear of failure that creating something new often accompanies me. (Thus the reason I'm giving myself a full year to accomplish two collages.)
So there you have it. The three goals for me to accomplish by September 1, 2020.
Please let me know if you are a goal setter and how that is going.
Till next week.....
xo
I am reading The Miracle Equation by Hal Elrod and was inspired by this book to set new goals for myself now. I am a bit hesitant to share them publicly as "someone" may hold me accountable! However, if I'm serious about attaining these goals, wouldn't I want to be held accountable?
So here goes; my three goals are:
1. To have this blog read by people I don't know - having it go public and getting noticed.
2. To have attained level 3.5 in pickleball.
3. To have completed a collage for my son and one of the San Francisco skyline.
There, I've said it. Phew.
A bit of an explanation regarding my goals is needed. My first goal to have my blog noticed is because it's not being read. There are hundreds of thousands of blogs out there and mine is a little personal one yet it would be nice to have someone read it. Yes, friends are reading it and actually that is very important but many of them already know what is going on in my life. I'm really writing this blog because having lived six decades I have experienced events that might be helpful to others if I share them.
Goal two - I started playing pickleball this year and am totally and completely addicted and want to improve. I'm guessing I'm at a 2.5 level now and have no idea how quickly one can improve but a 3.5 doesn't seem out of reach. Perhaps I'm living in a dream - but I'll give it a shot.
I was painting for about 10 years and due to various circumstances took an extended break. Now I'm interested in creating collages. I completed my first collage this spring in honor of my son, Anthony, who died almost four years ago. I love that piece of art and it is hanging in my home. Now I will create one for my younger son, Nick, who is a remarkable young man.
I have begun two different ones about Nick, but was unhappy with them. Time to start anew and work through the fear of failure that creating something new often accompanies me. (Thus the reason I'm giving myself a full year to accomplish two collages.)
So there you have it. The three goals for me to accomplish by September 1, 2020.
Please let me know if you are a goal setter and how that is going.
Till next week.....
xo
Thursday, August 29, 2019
Goal Setting
I'm reading a book by Hal Elrod - The Miracle Equation. I'm familiar with Hal as I read his book The Miracle Morning that was co-authored by two of his Miracle Morning "graduates". There are several versions of this book and the one I read is co-authored by Joe Polish and Anna David.
The Miracle Morning book has significantly changed the way I approach my day. I have been living the Miracle Morning way for over a year now and my life is so much more productive because of it. Thus, I purchased his newest tome and am only a few pages in and am inspired.
The reason I'm mentioning this is because I still believe in goal setting even though I have been retired for several years. Many believe this is a time to rest on our laurels and simply "take it easy".
I have set three goals for me to reach in one year - by September 1, 2020. Yes, most people set goals, resolutions or intentions on January 1, but who said it must be that way? I'm still refining my goals which is why the start date is next week.
The crux of the book is that with the miracle formula Hal writes about, success is inevitable. He admits to not creating it but discovering it. The formula is certainly not new, but my attention was brought to it and with his enthusiastic manner, I too, believe that if I follow the advice, I will achieve my goals.
The formula he gives is Unwavering Faith + Extraordinary Effort = Miracles. As I said, not new, but a winning strategy, if followed.
Of course, one must be steadfast and not give up. As we know, motivation is always stronger at the beginning of any new venture. This is where Unwavering Faith comes in. As we're working towards our goal we know we must do our best and give it our all or - Extraordinary Effort.
In a future post I will share with you my three goals for the upcoming year. I'm excited about them and determined to see them to fruition.
xo
The Miracle Morning book has significantly changed the way I approach my day. I have been living the Miracle Morning way for over a year now and my life is so much more productive because of it. Thus, I purchased his newest tome and am only a few pages in and am inspired.
The reason I'm mentioning this is because I still believe in goal setting even though I have been retired for several years. Many believe this is a time to rest on our laurels and simply "take it easy".
I have set three goals for me to reach in one year - by September 1, 2020. Yes, most people set goals, resolutions or intentions on January 1, but who said it must be that way? I'm still refining my goals which is why the start date is next week.
The crux of the book is that with the miracle formula Hal writes about, success is inevitable. He admits to not creating it but discovering it. The formula is certainly not new, but my attention was brought to it and with his enthusiastic manner, I too, believe that if I follow the advice, I will achieve my goals.
The formula he gives is Unwavering Faith + Extraordinary Effort = Miracles. As I said, not new, but a winning strategy, if followed.
Of course, one must be steadfast and not give up. As we know, motivation is always stronger at the beginning of any new venture. This is where Unwavering Faith comes in. As we're working towards our goal we know we must do our best and give it our all or - Extraordinary Effort.
In a future post I will share with you my three goals for the upcoming year. I'm excited about them and determined to see them to fruition.
xo
Thursday, August 22, 2019
More About Friendships
I've written previously about friendships and how important they are to me. I spent time with two dear friends on my last visit to California a week ago.
My friend, Susie, and I have been friends for approximately 15 years, we're never quite sure how long it's been, and time is of no importance. She is one of my older friends - she turned 80 in June and is quite amazing. She swims most every day, has her 6 year old grandson overnight at least once a week and still runs an eldercare business, employing several people and managing the cases. When I visit CA we get together at least once without fail - usually for lunch or dinner. We have the same political leanings - as do most of my friends and also similar spiritual beliefs. Often our conversations revolve around these topics. She is a sweetheart.
The other girlfriend I saw on my last trip is Allison, a classically trained artist. Allison paints in oils and watercolors and draws figures in ink or charcoal. She also has produced amazing sculptures. Now she has written a memoir. I'm always stunned when someone is as multi-talented as she.
Allison and I have been friends for over 20 years and we don't see one another as often as I see my other California friends, but I don't love her any less than the others. It's always a joy to be with her and we can talk for hours when we do get together. Our fathers were quite similar - strict and authoritarian and we were both raised in the Catholic Church - quite clearly heartfelt topics to discuss.
She has encouraged and advised me regarding my art. Of course, I'm just an amateur and create art strictly for myself while Allison creates for other's enjoyment and purchase.
We also discuss books that have helped us overcome the fear that can be present when creating art. She recommended Art and Fear to me, and I informed her of a favorite of mine; Art and Soul, Reloaded. For Allison - it is a huge part of her existence - not the fear, but the art! It's wonderful to have someone with whom to share bits of our lives.
Whenever I have been with Allison, I am inspired to not only be a better artist but to take that leap of faith that creating requires.
My friends make me a better person and a more motivated individual.
xo
My friend, Susie, and I have been friends for approximately 15 years, we're never quite sure how long it's been, and time is of no importance. She is one of my older friends - she turned 80 in June and is quite amazing. She swims most every day, has her 6 year old grandson overnight at least once a week and still runs an eldercare business, employing several people and managing the cases. When I visit CA we get together at least once without fail - usually for lunch or dinner. We have the same political leanings - as do most of my friends and also similar spiritual beliefs. Often our conversations revolve around these topics. She is a sweetheart.
The other girlfriend I saw on my last trip is Allison, a classically trained artist. Allison paints in oils and watercolors and draws figures in ink or charcoal. She also has produced amazing sculptures. Now she has written a memoir. I'm always stunned when someone is as multi-talented as she.
Allison and I have been friends for over 20 years and we don't see one another as often as I see my other California friends, but I don't love her any less than the others. It's always a joy to be with her and we can talk for hours when we do get together. Our fathers were quite similar - strict and authoritarian and we were both raised in the Catholic Church - quite clearly heartfelt topics to discuss.
She has encouraged and advised me regarding my art. Of course, I'm just an amateur and create art strictly for myself while Allison creates for other's enjoyment and purchase.
We also discuss books that have helped us overcome the fear that can be present when creating art. She recommended Art and Fear to me, and I informed her of a favorite of mine; Art and Soul, Reloaded. For Allison - it is a huge part of her existence - not the fear, but the art! It's wonderful to have someone with whom to share bits of our lives.
Whenever I have been with Allison, I am inspired to not only be a better artist but to take that leap of faith that creating requires.
My friends make me a better person and a more motivated individual.
xo
Thursday, August 15, 2019
Children and How Can They Be This Age?
My younger son, Nick, turned 35 on August 9. How can that be? I know many of us say this:"I remember his birth (or whatever the event was) like it was yesterday". Jeez. I recall my grandmother saying things like that. I would smile and perhaps roll my eyes never really understanding the concept of a great deal of time passing and recalling an event with amazement.
My older son, Anthony, died almost 4 years ago. He would've been 41in December.
Is that possible and still feel as though I have many, many wonderful, active, fruitful years left? Of course, it is.
My sister's only child, Michael, is 40. Saturday, I took my son Nick to the San Francisco Giant's game for his birthday and, coincidentally, Michael was chosen by his boss to throw out the first pitch at that game! What a memory making opportunity it was for him. And for us to share in that thrill.
Michael and Anthony were only 6 1/2 weeks apart and were more like brothers than cousins growing up. Anthony walked first, Michael was right behind him. And yes, I remember those days like it was yesterday. Nick came along 5 1/2 years later - yup, just like yesterday.
I'm in California right now. My son, Nick, lives in San Francisco, my sister and my nephew and his wife live in Marin as do friends I've had for 40 years and counting. Those 40 years have literally flown by.
I reunited with my high school sweetheart, who is my husband now, six years ago and the first day we reconnected seems like a heartbeat ago.
As you have also have experienced, as we age, time simply goes by in a flash. Again, I love my life, am grateful for all the good and the not so good, as it has gotten me where I am today. I'm pleased with the woman I've become and I plan on doing a whole lot more - including giving back, traveling, excelling at my favorite new sport - pickleball, creating more art and sharing my love with everyone who crosses my path.
xo
My older son, Anthony, died almost 4 years ago. He would've been 41in December.
Is that possible and still feel as though I have many, many wonderful, active, fruitful years left? Of course, it is.
My sister's only child, Michael, is 40. Saturday, I took my son Nick to the San Francisco Giant's game for his birthday and, coincidentally, Michael was chosen by his boss to throw out the first pitch at that game! What a memory making opportunity it was for him. And for us to share in that thrill.
Michael and Anthony were only 6 1/2 weeks apart and were more like brothers than cousins growing up. Anthony walked first, Michael was right behind him. And yes, I remember those days like it was yesterday. Nick came along 5 1/2 years later - yup, just like yesterday.
I'm in California right now. My son, Nick, lives in San Francisco, my sister and my nephew and his wife live in Marin as do friends I've had for 40 years and counting. Those 40 years have literally flown by.
I reunited with my high school sweetheart, who is my husband now, six years ago and the first day we reconnected seems like a heartbeat ago.
As you have also have experienced, as we age, time simply goes by in a flash. Again, I love my life, am grateful for all the good and the not so good, as it has gotten me where I am today. I'm pleased with the woman I've become and I plan on doing a whole lot more - including giving back, traveling, excelling at my favorite new sport - pickleball, creating more art and sharing my love with everyone who crosses my path.
xo
Thursday, August 8, 2019
Making and Nurturing New Friendships
This past year has been filled with new relationships. It's an unexpected windfall at this age.
As I've written previously, making friends after one retires can be difficult, especially after retiring and moving to a new community in another state.
My first few years in Arizona were missing that girlfriend we all need. After living in California for over 40 years I had developed and nurtured quite a few wonderful friends and leaving them was difficult. Fortunately, for me I keep an apartment in Marin County and am able to visit every month or two.
My husband introduced me to his friends and their wives, however, our friendship outside of being "couples" didn't develop. They were already well established in AZ and had friends, or several still worked and others were not that near to our neighborhood.
Fortunately, 2 1/2 years after moving to AZ I met my dear friend Shannon and she has been such a gift. I don't know what I would've done if we hadn't met and become fast friends.
As I alluded to in my opening, the past year has been filled to overflowing with new friends and acquaintances. One of the reasons for this has been because I stepped outside of my comfort zone and got involved in new activities.
I have met and become friends with a wonderful group of women due to my pickle ball activities. We all took lessons through our local Park & Rec and exchanged phone numbers and now we are playing as often as we can, and that is usually three or more times a week for some of us. We are all about the same age give or take a few years and having this crazy love for this sport has bonded us. A few ladies outside of Park & Rec have joined us and they fit in perfectly, too. I must say, I am so thrilled to have this group that has made my life fuller and happier.
There are two additional friendships I have made that came about because of friends on the East Coast. Both of my new friends recently moved to Arizona, one from Florida and the other from New York. My older friends introduced them to me - one via a phone call and the other in person. I feel so lucky that these women have come into my life and I hope our friendships develop and I can add to their lives, as well.
What a wonderful surprise to have these new friends - such a gift!
xo
As I've written previously, making friends after one retires can be difficult, especially after retiring and moving to a new community in another state.
My first few years in Arizona were missing that girlfriend we all need. After living in California for over 40 years I had developed and nurtured quite a few wonderful friends and leaving them was difficult. Fortunately, for me I keep an apartment in Marin County and am able to visit every month or two.
My husband introduced me to his friends and their wives, however, our friendship outside of being "couples" didn't develop. They were already well established in AZ and had friends, or several still worked and others were not that near to our neighborhood.
Fortunately, 2 1/2 years after moving to AZ I met my dear friend Shannon and she has been such a gift. I don't know what I would've done if we hadn't met and become fast friends.
As I alluded to in my opening, the past year has been filled to overflowing with new friends and acquaintances. One of the reasons for this has been because I stepped outside of my comfort zone and got involved in new activities.
I have met and become friends with a wonderful group of women due to my pickle ball activities. We all took lessons through our local Park & Rec and exchanged phone numbers and now we are playing as often as we can, and that is usually three or more times a week for some of us. We are all about the same age give or take a few years and having this crazy love for this sport has bonded us. A few ladies outside of Park & Rec have joined us and they fit in perfectly, too. I must say, I am so thrilled to have this group that has made my life fuller and happier.
There are two additional friendships I have made that came about because of friends on the East Coast. Both of my new friends recently moved to Arizona, one from Florida and the other from New York. My older friends introduced them to me - one via a phone call and the other in person. I feel so lucky that these women have come into my life and I hope our friendships develop and I can add to their lives, as well.
What a wonderful surprise to have these new friends - such a gift!
xo
Thursday, August 1, 2019
Are Chores Getting in the Way?
In a previous post I wrote about how I love to read however, it never seems as though there's enough time for it. How can this be since I'm retired?
Here's the situation: I arise most mornings at 5:15 so I can (or try to) fit in everything I want to do. I begin with my morning meditation that takes about 20 minutes. Then it's time to get ready for my exercise and at least three days a week that means pickleball (I've become addicted). There is a group of us that meets at the local YMCA at 6:30 a.m. where we set up the net and play for about 2 hours, sometimes more. On the other days I either hike/walk or hit the gym early, especially in summer when temperatures in Arizona surpass 100 degrees by late morning.
When I return from whatever exercise I chose that day, it's time to caffeine up and have a bite of breakfast. By this time it's mid-to-late morning and chores have begun - generally a load of wash, wiping the kitchen counters, sprucing up the bathrooms, making beds, etc., etc. Even with a house cleaner every few weeks there is always so much to be done (especially with a hairy Golden Retriever as part of our family).
Once or twice a week there's a run to the supermarket for a big shopping and a follow-up smaller shopping, perhaps a run to Costco or Target - you know the routine.
By the time all of these responsibilities are completed there may be some time in the afternoon for a bit of reading before dinner must be started. But, never enough time to satisfy me! Don't get me wrong, I have a wonderful life, a sweet (though not very tidy) husband, and am blessed with good health, wonderful friends and a loving family- still I'd like a few more hours in the day to take part in all the activities I love. And I haven't even mentioned taking in an afternoon movie occasionally, or meeting a friend for lunch.
Yes, those darn chores are always there waiting for me. That is something I can bet on. However, as I've said - life is good and I am so grateful.
xo
Here's the situation: I arise most mornings at 5:15 so I can (or try to) fit in everything I want to do. I begin with my morning meditation that takes about 20 minutes. Then it's time to get ready for my exercise and at least three days a week that means pickleball (I've become addicted). There is a group of us that meets at the local YMCA at 6:30 a.m. where we set up the net and play for about 2 hours, sometimes more. On the other days I either hike/walk or hit the gym early, especially in summer when temperatures in Arizona surpass 100 degrees by late morning.
When I return from whatever exercise I chose that day, it's time to caffeine up and have a bite of breakfast. By this time it's mid-to-late morning and chores have begun - generally a load of wash, wiping the kitchen counters, sprucing up the bathrooms, making beds, etc., etc. Even with a house cleaner every few weeks there is always so much to be done (especially with a hairy Golden Retriever as part of our family).
Once or twice a week there's a run to the supermarket for a big shopping and a follow-up smaller shopping, perhaps a run to Costco or Target - you know the routine.
By the time all of these responsibilities are completed there may be some time in the afternoon for a bit of reading before dinner must be started. But, never enough time to satisfy me! Don't get me wrong, I have a wonderful life, a sweet (though not very tidy) husband, and am blessed with good health, wonderful friends and a loving family- still I'd like a few more hours in the day to take part in all the activities I love. And I haven't even mentioned taking in an afternoon movie occasionally, or meeting a friend for lunch.
Yes, those darn chores are always there waiting for me. That is something I can bet on. However, as I've said - life is good and I am so grateful.
xo
Thursday, July 25, 2019
My Most Recent Reads
I love to read. Always have. And I am one of those odd (so I've been told) people who have several books going at once. I am always reading a novel, a self-development book, one on sobriety, something spiritual and at times, I add a book on physical fitness that has caught my attention.
The physical fitness book I'm currently reading is Becoming Ageless by Strauss Zelnick. He is a very successful CEO who changed his lifestyle and his body by changing both his diet and his workout. Very inspiring, though I must say that at my age I have no intention of working out as hard as he does. Though, I have been motivated to increase my muscle strengthening workout.
The spiritual/self-development/sobriety book (this one book covers all areas) I'm reading (re-reading actually) is The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod, Anna David and Joe Polish. This is the book that changed my morning routine almost one year ago and I'm still following today. The book is chock full of great tips, ideas and motivation thus the re-reading of it.
Another spiritual book I peruse when I need a pick-me-up is The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer. Again, another book I've had for several years and never fails to exhilarate me.
The fiction I'm reading is A Man Called Ove by Fredrik Bachman about a curmudgeon of a man and his attitude and musings on life and people. I've just begun it and am enjoying it.
The novel that I just finished is Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman. Eleanor is a quirky woman and has been compared to a young, female version of Ove, the curmudgeon. She is quite a character and the book follows her journey. At times she was frustrating and naive but precious.
The fiction I read prior to this is Less by Andrew Greer. Another interesting and complicated individual. I loved the ending! (I'm a sucker for happy endings).
That is a peek into my reading at the moment. I'm always up for something new and interesting. My problem is, finding the time. Even a retired woman has difficulty finding time for reading - but that's another post!
xo
The physical fitness book I'm currently reading is Becoming Ageless by Strauss Zelnick. He is a very successful CEO who changed his lifestyle and his body by changing both his diet and his workout. Very inspiring, though I must say that at my age I have no intention of working out as hard as he does. Though, I have been motivated to increase my muscle strengthening workout.
The spiritual/self-development/sobriety book (this one book covers all areas) I'm reading (re-reading actually) is The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod, Anna David and Joe Polish. This is the book that changed my morning routine almost one year ago and I'm still following today. The book is chock full of great tips, ideas and motivation thus the re-reading of it.
Another spiritual book I peruse when I need a pick-me-up is The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer. Again, another book I've had for several years and never fails to exhilarate me.
The fiction I'm reading is A Man Called Ove by Fredrik Bachman about a curmudgeon of a man and his attitude and musings on life and people. I've just begun it and am enjoying it.
The novel that I just finished is Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman. Eleanor is a quirky woman and has been compared to a young, female version of Ove, the curmudgeon. She is quite a character and the book follows her journey. At times she was frustrating and naive but precious.
The fiction I read prior to this is Less by Andrew Greer. Another interesting and complicated individual. I loved the ending! (I'm a sucker for happy endings).
That is a peek into my reading at the moment. I'm always up for something new and interesting. My problem is, finding the time. Even a retired woman has difficulty finding time for reading - but that's another post!
xo
Wednesday, July 17, 2019
Challenges as We Age
I'm so glad I'm here on earth; healthy, alcohol-free, blessed with family and friends both near and far, a loving hubby and adorable dog and despite a few ageing issues, so blessed to be taking part in life.
So, what's up with the "ageing issues"? I love being active. I'm so into pickleball right now that it's become an obsession (almost). I'm playing at least three times a week with a wonderful group of women I met taking lessons. My body, however, is not always cooperative. Granted, it hasn't stopped me from playing, yet there are days my knees are screaming or the arthritis in my hands is acting up or my back is achy.
This is all part and parcel of advanced years. I have always been active and in my younger days I was a runner, almost on a daily basis. After many years of that the orthopedic doctor I consulted for knee pain recommended a knee replacement. Five years later, the other knee was replaced, as well. I felt 100% better and almost entirely pain-free. Now, however, I am experiencing a bit of pain - but it's been 12 years and 7 years since the surgeries, so not unexpected. The other issues are basically normal as we age - mostly arthritis.
One night I awoke from a dream and I was gasping for breath. I was dreaming that I was climbing a steep hill and my heart was beating rapidly and I was breathing hard from the effort. At first I was relieved that it was only a dream but them I realized that I actually couldn't catch my breath. Hmmm. Was that from the dream or was the dream a result of my having difficulty breathing?
My doctor recommended a sleep study that I was able to take at home over two nights and sure enough - I have mild sleep apnea. Now I am armed with a CPAP mask nightly. Is that ever attractive! Struggling a bit with it but adjusting. And grateful that there are such devices to help keep our breathing steady during sleep.
The above are minor compared to major diseases and various ailments that others are suffering from. And once again, I count myself among the very lucky and blessed.
xo
So, what's up with the "ageing issues"? I love being active. I'm so into pickleball right now that it's become an obsession (almost). I'm playing at least three times a week with a wonderful group of women I met taking lessons. My body, however, is not always cooperative. Granted, it hasn't stopped me from playing, yet there are days my knees are screaming or the arthritis in my hands is acting up or my back is achy.
This is all part and parcel of advanced years. I have always been active and in my younger days I was a runner, almost on a daily basis. After many years of that the orthopedic doctor I consulted for knee pain recommended a knee replacement. Five years later, the other knee was replaced, as well. I felt 100% better and almost entirely pain-free. Now, however, I am experiencing a bit of pain - but it's been 12 years and 7 years since the surgeries, so not unexpected. The other issues are basically normal as we age - mostly arthritis.
One night I awoke from a dream and I was gasping for breath. I was dreaming that I was climbing a steep hill and my heart was beating rapidly and I was breathing hard from the effort. At first I was relieved that it was only a dream but them I realized that I actually couldn't catch my breath. Hmmm. Was that from the dream or was the dream a result of my having difficulty breathing?
My doctor recommended a sleep study that I was able to take at home over two nights and sure enough - I have mild sleep apnea. Now I am armed with a CPAP mask nightly. Is that ever attractive! Struggling a bit with it but adjusting. And grateful that there are such devices to help keep our breathing steady during sleep.
The above are minor compared to major diseases and various ailments that others are suffering from. And once again, I count myself among the very lucky and blessed.
xo
Thursday, July 11, 2019
Focusing on Priorities
We all have activities we love and then there are those that we don't love but are necessary and finally; there are those pursuits that we once enjoyed but for whatever reason, have taken a back seat to our other interests.
This is what is going on with me right now. I'm reevaluating what is important to me, where I should put my focus and attention and what endeavors I should let go.
For almost five years I have been a volunteer at the Phoenix Art Museum. I love museums and this one is no exception. I love perusing the art that is in the permanent collection as well as the temporary exhibits that are on loan to the museum at various times of the year.
Of course, my volunteer role is not to view the art, although that is definitely encouraged, but my position is to interact with the patrons. We answer their questions and also suggest what exhibits they should not miss and interact when it seems appropriate and give them space when they appear to be enjoying the art on their own.
Since the end of last year I have added several more activities to my day. Something's gotta go!
Obviously, I'm writing this blog that I began December 30 of last year. It's just a little diddy but it does take up some brain waves and a bit of time. Also, at the end of 2018 I took up pickleball. My friend Shannon and I took lessons but I did not actively engage in the sport until Spring of this year and I am addicted! Oh my gosh, it is so much fun and great exercise as well. I am now playing several mornings a week. I have made wonderful new friends and am exercising in a way my body has not been accustomed to.
In addition to the above, I have brought creating art back into my life. Ten or so years ago I was painting and taking weekly lessons and created several decent pieces. I let that go when my life changed and I am happy to welcome that creative outlet back in. Rather than painting though, I am creating collages.
It's also important to me to stay in contact with my friends and to have an outing with at least one of them every week or so. All of these events take up a good portion of my time.
And last but not least there's time I want to spend with my husband (and my dog, Merlin). None of the above activities involve them so it's important to have special time together and that usually takes place from the dinner hour into the evening with snippets of time caught during the day. Phew, life is busy but wonderful.
xo
This is what is going on with me right now. I'm reevaluating what is important to me, where I should put my focus and attention and what endeavors I should let go.
For almost five years I have been a volunteer at the Phoenix Art Museum. I love museums and this one is no exception. I love perusing the art that is in the permanent collection as well as the temporary exhibits that are on loan to the museum at various times of the year.
Of course, my volunteer role is not to view the art, although that is definitely encouraged, but my position is to interact with the patrons. We answer their questions and also suggest what exhibits they should not miss and interact when it seems appropriate and give them space when they appear to be enjoying the art on their own.
Since the end of last year I have added several more activities to my day. Something's gotta go!
Obviously, I'm writing this blog that I began December 30 of last year. It's just a little diddy but it does take up some brain waves and a bit of time. Also, at the end of 2018 I took up pickleball. My friend Shannon and I took lessons but I did not actively engage in the sport until Spring of this year and I am addicted! Oh my gosh, it is so much fun and great exercise as well. I am now playing several mornings a week. I have made wonderful new friends and am exercising in a way my body has not been accustomed to.
In addition to the above, I have brought creating art back into my life. Ten or so years ago I was painting and taking weekly lessons and created several decent pieces. I let that go when my life changed and I am happy to welcome that creative outlet back in. Rather than painting though, I am creating collages.
It's also important to me to stay in contact with my friends and to have an outing with at least one of them every week or so. All of these events take up a good portion of my time.
And last but not least there's time I want to spend with my husband (and my dog, Merlin). None of the above activities involve them so it's important to have special time together and that usually takes place from the dinner hour into the evening with snippets of time caught during the day. Phew, life is busy but wonderful.
xo
Friday, July 5, 2019
What Matters
I was planning on writing about my vacation to New Jersey and New York that was wonderful. New York City is always exciting especially when one gets to go to a musical. We saw a remake of "Kiss Me Kate". As expected, it was great. The way these actors can sing and dance (at the same time, yet!) is astounding. And the city always fascinates. Even though I grew up nearby just across the Hudson River in N.J.; visiting Manhattan is always a treat.
However, my takeaway from this vacation was how much I enjoy being with the people I care about. This is more important than sightseeing, or visiting museums, landmarks, etc. This is not surprising as I always appreciate my friends and family but living clear across the country makes my time with them even more precious.
We were there for a week and stayed with my husband's younger sister, Terry, in the house they all grew up in. Terry is 6 years younger than Bill and me and I adore her. She is one of the kindest, most loving and generous people I know. It's so easy and relaxing staying with her. Bill's younger brother lives a few blocks away and we saw him several times and he is a sweet man, a loving father, grandfather and uncle. His older sister, Rosemary lives in the next town, where I grew up and we spent quite a bit of time with her. She and her husband generously threw a party for us and we were able to spend time with nieces, their husbands and many great nieces and nephews. We had a wonderful time visiting and hearing the latest news.
My sister and my nephew and his wife and children live in nearby New York state - about 45 minutes away. We spent the afternoon with them dining at a lovely restaurant on the Hudson River and catching up on the latest. My nephew and his wife were expecting their third child and in fact - she gave birth a few days ago to a girl - her other two being boys.
As I mentioned in previous posts, Bill and I were high school sweethearts and dated for over three years. We parted and went on to marry others and have children, divorce and as fate would have it - came back together 50 years later and are now married.
That, of course means, his siblings were in my life way back then and to have them once again in my life is a joy. I loved them 50 years ago and I love and appreciate them even more now. We have a connection that runs deep and we have a ball reminiscing about our times at the beach and other adventures we had as teens.
We also spent time with friends and every minute with them was a blast.
Of course, we all have traveled diverse roads and our life experiences have shaped who we are today and I'm sure we have many differences yet we have a bond that blessedly makes our time together lovely and loving.
Dear friends and family - that's what makes life a delight!
xo
However, my takeaway from this vacation was how much I enjoy being with the people I care about. This is more important than sightseeing, or visiting museums, landmarks, etc. This is not surprising as I always appreciate my friends and family but living clear across the country makes my time with them even more precious.
We were there for a week and stayed with my husband's younger sister, Terry, in the house they all grew up in. Terry is 6 years younger than Bill and me and I adore her. She is one of the kindest, most loving and generous people I know. It's so easy and relaxing staying with her. Bill's younger brother lives a few blocks away and we saw him several times and he is a sweet man, a loving father, grandfather and uncle. His older sister, Rosemary lives in the next town, where I grew up and we spent quite a bit of time with her. She and her husband generously threw a party for us and we were able to spend time with nieces, their husbands and many great nieces and nephews. We had a wonderful time visiting and hearing the latest news.
My sister and my nephew and his wife and children live in nearby New York state - about 45 minutes away. We spent the afternoon with them dining at a lovely restaurant on the Hudson River and catching up on the latest. My nephew and his wife were expecting their third child and in fact - she gave birth a few days ago to a girl - her other two being boys.
As I mentioned in previous posts, Bill and I were high school sweethearts and dated for over three years. We parted and went on to marry others and have children, divorce and as fate would have it - came back together 50 years later and are now married.
That, of course means, his siblings were in my life way back then and to have them once again in my life is a joy. I loved them 50 years ago and I love and appreciate them even more now. We have a connection that runs deep and we have a ball reminiscing about our times at the beach and other adventures we had as teens.
We also spent time with friends and every minute with them was a blast.
Of course, we all have traveled diverse roads and our life experiences have shaped who we are today and I'm sure we have many differences yet we have a bond that blessedly makes our time together lovely and loving.
Dear friends and family - that's what makes life a delight!
xo
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