More About Drinking

A little over 5 years ago I retired and began spending more time in Arizona with my "significant other" (I feel too old to call him my boyfriend!). He was already retired and settled into a quiet life of occasional lunches with buddies and tending to the pool and yard chores.  I had always been very active, and California - Marin County especially, supported this active lifestyle with it's perfect weather and many opportunities to be outdoors.

I hiked the hills of Marin and Sonoma with friends and kayaked with my son when I was lucky enough to catch a free day of his. In addition, I often would go to San Francisco's amazing museums with my sister or a friend to not only view art but to spend time soaking up the vibes of the City at outdoor cafes or strolling the charming neighborhoods and shops. In addition, there was always an art, wine or music festival to check out. It was a full, productive and busy life.

Not so much in AZ.  The summer months are unbearably hot and most activities take place indoors. Sure we have a pool but at times (most of the summer) the water would reach the 90's while the air temp was over 110! Not exactly refreshing. I must say, winters are lovely, except it gets very crowded as the "snowbirds" descend on us to get out of the cold Midwest.

My husband enjoys a late afternoon/early evening cocktail (or two) daily and I began partaking with him.  Mine usually consisted of a chilled glass of wine, but over the next couple of years together I also developed a hankering for a cocktail - often a Black Russian.

When I grew tired of the Black Russians, I moved on to Cosmopolitans.  After all, if the Sex and the City girls could indulge, why couldn't I?  And I became rather adept at mixing them just to my liking.

Accidentally, I discovered Manhattans.  I had a bad headache one day at a party and the bartender suggested that a Manhattan would be the cure.  Indeed it was!  As he handed it to me he said: "night, night!"   I didn't fall asleep but the headache disappeared.

Being a quick study, I learned how to make them at home and again, adjust them to my taste.

Right around this time I began to suspect there was a problem with alcohol for me.  It no longer was casual and light and social.  It became that I wanted/needed to have something every evening.  Often I would have not one, but two and sometimes three and regret it terribly, not only the next morning, but during the night when I would awake around 2 or 3 am in a hot, panicky state, angry at myself for overdoing. I would resolve that tomorrow would be different, that I wouldn't drink at all, or if I did - it would be one glass of wine. Period.  Sometimes I would be able to keep to my plan, other times not.

In the spring of 2016  I discovered a book by Annie Grace called This Naked Mind and it was all about drinking and specifically women and drinking, though it was written for all.

On May 9 of that year I went to South Dakota to visit my son at graduate school.  This was the perfect opportunity to not only read the book, but since he seldom drinks, to be alcohol-free for the four or so days we would be together.

My plan worked and I didn't drink while there or for the following three months!  I was ecstatic and feeling great and extremely proud of myself.

Then a trip to New Jersey came up.............

We'll pick this up in the next post.
xo